SW Blog
Thoughts, Opinions, & Advice From a "Retired" SW

May, 2022

Sex Work And Healthy Boundaries

Most of the time, we are led to believe that saying yes to things invites more opportunities and/or makes us more appealing. But the truth is, not every situation is right to give your consent. The same applies to sex workers. Remember this fact; the more gracious you are, the more they’ll take advantage of you.

Being a sex worker is nothing to look down on. In fact, most women claim it is empowering. But that only happens when you’re taking the right steps and staying in control of what should and what should not happen during intimacy.

Why Set Boundaries?

Setting boundaries may come off as a harsh step for those who are used to saying yes to everything. But if you’re a sex worker, this is the only way you’ll be able to protect your body and your mental health.

If you do sex work, it is always healthy and beneficial to set healthy boundaries to preserve your dignity and peace of mind. Know your limits, and don’t hesitate to voice your opinion. It also helps to remain current with resources such as the Sex Workers Project, which works to defend the human rights of sex workers.

Service Boundaries

We got to accept that every sex worker is different. They have different personalities, desires, expectations, goals, and more. So, everyone’s wishes and boundaries vary.

Take some time to think about what you would like from your clients. Of course, every day is different, and every client is unique. And your desires and energy levels are also constantly shifting. Some days, you’ll want to lay low, and some days you’ll want to unleash your wild side.

So, even if you set boundaries, don’t be too rigid because sometimes, flexibility is required when you’re a sex worker, especially if it is something that won’t give you too much pressure or trauma later on. Who knows, you might even enjoy yourself to the fullest when you try something new. Always remember to put yourself first before trying out any new endeavors.

Service boundaries can include your choice of clothing, access to certain body parts, and physical actions.

Time Boundaries

Time is everything. Boundaries around time are one of the most important aspects to consider as a sex worker. The amount of time to allow someone in their life will depend on different individuals.

Time is money, and only you can set a healthy time boundary. Make sure you don’t fall into persistent demands for more time if you’ve already set a limit. Consider the external factors that take up your time, such as driving to the destination, communicating with the clients and more.

Maintain a proper schedule and stick to it like a professional. Consider your abilities and stamina and choose a working time that wouldn’t leave you overworked. Self-love is key to maintaining a healthy work regime.

Compensation Boundaries

If you’re new in the business, it could be hard to decide what is and what is not acceptable. Sure, money makes the world go around, but would you be willing to sacrifice your peace and dignity for something you aren’t comfortable with?

Set your worth. For how much are you willing to make yourself available to your clients? How much do you think you deserve for the service that you offer?

Don’t stoop too low by making yourself very cheap. You’re an amazing being and worth more than what the world thinks of you. Don’t be disheartened if a client cannot afford you. There isn’t just one fish in the sea.

Those who know your worth will have no complaints about your rate. Don’t let someone’s narrow mind and average status prompt you to lower your standards.

Also, remember, don’t be tempted to do something irrelevant just to bag some extra cash. Once you break your healthy boundaries for money, there is a chance that your clients will see you as a puppet whose morals can be bent with money. Stay precious.

Client Boundaries

The world is filled with so many different types of people. You never know what kind of a person your client will be. They could be gentlemen in bed but also, but they could be those people who enjoy aggressive sex.

Be sure to have proper communication with your clients about your service. There are undoubtedly going to be disagreements, but if you stand your ground, people will eventually take your limits seriously. Whether it is a regular client or someone who’s offering lots of money, learn to say no if the activities entail what you don’t want to do.

As long as you feel comfortable in your skin and body, there is nothing wrong with being a sex worker. You’re embracing your flawless beauty and channeling it for a living.

Being a sex worker means that you have liberty over the type of service you want to offer. If you wish to be respected in your business, don’t just go where the wind blows. Stand your ground, state your boundaries, and let the right clients find you.

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